Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Psalm 139:23
As I drove home after lunch with my best friend, I thanked God out loud for her. She knows me and loves me in spite of things I don’t love about myself. She’s one of a small circle of people who accept me as I am—my quirks, habits, and screw-ups. Still, there are parts of my story I resist sharing even with her and others that I love—times where I’ve clearly not been the hero, times I’ve been judgmental or unkind or unloving.
But God does know my whole story. He’s the One I can freely talk to even if I’m reluctant to talk with others.
The familiar words of Psalm 139 describe the intimacy we enjoy with our Sovereign King. He knows us completely! (v. 1). He’s “familiar with all [our] ways” (v. 3). He invites us to come to Him with our confusion, our anxious thoughts, and our struggles with temptation. When we’re willing to yield completely to Him, He reaches out to restore and rewrite the parts of our story that make us sad because we’ve wandered from Him.
God knows us better than anyone else ever can, and still . . . He loves us! When we daily surrender ourselves to Him and seek to know Him more fully, He can change our story for His glory. He’s the Author who’s continuing to write it.
What assurance do you have that God will always love you unconditionally? How can you make yielding to Him a daily practice?
Precious Father, thank You for loving me as Your child despite the times I’ve disappointed You. Help me to yield all of myself to You in full assurance that You’re faithfully walking beside me.
Psalm 139 echoes three different types of psalms: praise, lament, and wisdom. However, one key theme throughout is indicated by verses at the beginning and end of the psalm: God searches us, and He knows us (vv. 1, 23). The word used for “search” is a term that could be used in a legal case when someone is cross-examined; in other words, it involves God’s diligent probing. The word used for “know” means to know someone intimately and personally. It’s a word that’s sometimes used to refer to sexual relations. Used here, it shows that God knows the depths of our very being, which is pointed out by the psalmist who notes that God knit us together (v. 13). When the psalmist invites God to search his heart and “anxious thoughts” (v. 23), however, he’s vulnerably asking Him to know him on an even deeper level.